My Very First Blog Post

So this is where it all begins. I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm ok with that. Everyone has to start somewhere, right? My best friend said to me when I told him I was going to start this blog, but I had no idea what I was going to write about, "Doing something is better than doing nothing."

I've been wanting to start a blog since September 2017, but "never got around to it". I was always "too busy" or "distracted". But what it all boiled down to was that I was AFRAID. I was afraid that I wouldn't have anything relevant to say. I was afraid that I would fail. The funny thing about that fear is that BECAUSE I hadn't started it, and BECAUSE I was coming up with every excuse in the book to procrastinate, I had already failed.

I try to watch/listen to spiritual and inspirational teachers on YouTube daily, and one day, while at work, I was listening to a video and the teacher said, "...I had lost 100% of the races I didn't attempt," and then it hit me, like a ton of bricks. All these things, these callings of the heart that I'd been having, that I was avoiding because of this irrational fear of failing, I was ALREADY failing at because I hadn't even so much as ATTEMPTED to start. So here I am. In all my inexperienced glory.

The fear of not "doing it right" was my smokescreen and blindfold. It was the edge of my cliff to leap off into the unknown, where I had, and still HAVE no idea what is going to happen. But my NEED and PULL to do this, to START this became so much bigger than that fear, once I had accepted the fact that I'm afraid of that unknown, that I couldn't come up with any more excuses to procrastinate. So here I am, at 2:42 am on October 17th, 2018, writing this.

Suddenly, I no longer have the fear I once had. Suddenly, I feel a relief and purge of something inside me that had I been suppressing and ignoring for more than a year. I have so much to share about my journey, as a woman, mother, and an infinite being that there is BOUND to be someone (or someones) out there that can relate. It's inevitable that my stories that I share, will touch someone's life, or will reassure them that they are not alone in this struggle and game we call life.

Or at least, that's my hope. I guess only time, and my courage to leap and willingness to stay on this train of momentum, will tell.